Random Jokes

Everyone posts a joke, and also rates the one above them. They do not have to be your own.

There is no joke above me, so NA/10

"There was once a plan to incorporate elements of Youtube, Twitter, and Facebook. It was called YouTwitFace. It didn't go over very well..."

10/10

Whats green and invisible?












Keepon going.....












Still keep on going...









A CABBAGE!

4/10 I don't get it at all...

You are walking down the street and a terrorist jumps out. He lifts a knife, praises Allah, and runs at you. You have a handgun with a large number after the decimal point in your pocket, and you are a perfect shot. What do you do?

DEMOCRAT: "Why is he attacking me? Has he been abused as a child? Have I ever done anything to hurt him? If we raised the taxes would it change his motives? Perhaps if the government took better care of this street he would be more mild..." *dies*

REPUBLICAN: *Blam!* *Hums "My Country 'Tis of Thee" while calmly walking on with his family*

SOUTHERNER: *Blam! Blam! Blam! Blam! Blam! Chk-Chk (sound of reloading) Blam! Blam! Blam! Blam! Blam!* "Die, yer foul-mouthed, lily-livered oil-suckin' sonofagun. *spits*

8/10

This girls mom thought lol meant lots of love.
The girls grandma dies and the mom text the girl:

"Your Grandma died, Lol."

7/10

A redhead walks into a bar and orders a bloody mary.

A brunette walks into a bar and orders a miller lite.

A blonde walks into a bar and breaks her nose.

DISCLAIMER: EYE HAVE NUTHING AGAINST BLOND PEOPLE. MOEST OF MI SIBLINGZ END SEVRAL OF MY FRENDS ARE BLOND, AND THEI ARE SUM OF THE MOST INTELLLIGENT PEEPLE I NO. BESIDES ME, OF COARSE.

6/10

Two muffins are in an oven.
*1 hour later*
One says to the other, "God it's hot in here!"
The other one exclaims, "HOLY CRAP! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

Lol 9/10

What did the peanut say when he sneezed?

"Cashew!"

XDDDD 10/10

Why did Anakin cross the road?

To get to the Dark Side!

xD 10/10

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

Because he didn't have the guts to do it! xP

7/10

Apple once wanted to make an iTouch for kids, they cancelled it after they called it "iTouchKids"

8/10

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me.....I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started".

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger".

He held her hand and said, "Second, I'd advise you to relax. Let's have a cup of coffee, then ..........." he sighed, "let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box."

10/10 xD


The joke is closer! closer... closer... closer... thegame

10/10 I JUST LOST THE GAME!!!!!

Why did the elephant went across the circus

To get PEEanuts.

3/10

Yo mama is so stupid, she went to the dentist to get a blue tooth.

10/10 xDD

The Game.